Anti-Heroin Chic
  • Home
  • About
  • Blog
  • Music
  • Art
  • Comedy
  • About Our Contributors
  • Masthead
  • Issues
  • About our contributors - 2019
  • About Our Contributors - 2020
  • About Our Contributors - 2021
  • Home
  • About
  • Blog
  • Music
  • Art
  • Comedy
  • About Our Contributors
  • Masthead
  • Issues
  • About our contributors - 2019
  • About Our Contributors - 2020
  • About Our Contributors - 2021
Search by typing & pressing enter

YOUR CART

​

7/20/2018

after your lobotomy By Holley Hyler

Picture



after your lobotomy

smiling, with the personality
of an oyster, you listened
while I told you about you.

you liked me better
once you had
forgotten me,

and I wondered when
you began to give up on me.
what had done it?

maybe it was when you realized that
mandalas were used by Hindus
and Buddhists;

you hated the sacrilege
that I committed with colored
pencils.

it is still manifesting,
permanent ink on my arms,
needles reminding me

how it feels to
not be flatlining,
displaying who I am

in such a way
that I can no longer
hide it.

I feel more alive
than ever before
when I am naked.

everything changed
when you were taught
to be ashamed of me.

when you forgot
your walls and why
you had built them,

when you forgot
that I was a sinful child
“going down an unhealthy path,”

you looked
at me, for the first time
in a long time,

with love
in your
eyes.

all I wanted
was for that
look to last a lifetime.

something precious
was stolen from me,
and from you too;

the problem is
I realize it
and you don’t.

you forgot you said,
“you don’t give up
on someone you love.”

you thought it would
cheer me up,
but it didn’t.

it only made me
feel worse that you
entertained the idea

of giving
up
on me.

and for what?
for my spirituality?
for my tattoo?

if anyone should
give up,
goddamn it, it’s me.

​
Picture
Holley Hyler has been published in Adelaide, Buck Off Magazine, Rebelle Society, and The Urban Howl. She was a finalist in the 2017 Adelaide Literary Awards with her essay, “Nonlinear,” and again in 2018 with a poem entitled “Clytie.” She is passionate about sixties music and the guitar. You can find more of her work on her website, holleyhyler.com.


Comments are closed.

    Author

    Write something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview.

    Archives

    December 2024
    November 2024
    August 2024
    July 2024
    April 2024
    March 2024
    December 2023
    November 2023
    October 2023
    September 2023
    August 2023
    July 2023
    June 2023
    March 2023
    December 2022
    October 2022
    July 2022
    June 2022
    May 2022
    April 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    August 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016

    Categories

    All

    RSS Feed

Powered by Create your own unique website with customizable templates.