Bright Pink Blow Up Doll By T. Bardou

​Bright Pink Blow Up Doll
 
 
I am a bright pink blow up doll
with a hank of yellow hair
mouth a round lipsticked O
costumed in spangles, glitter, and air
my body a miracle of impossible anatomy
squeaking rubber and quivering jello
bridled by cinching steel bones
I prance coquettishly in stiletto heels bleeding
where I cut off my toes with a razor.
 
The barker bawls: Your attention, Gentlemen, please!
Behind this very curtain, tonight on our stage
for your viewing pleasure, the enticing striptease
enacted by the delectable Mistress of Helotry!
A bona fide professional: she’s been broken in since childhood
even as a tiny girl well-worth a plattered prophet’s head.
And as she’s always willing, a veritable bargain at this price!
Lay your money down, and assuredly, I say to you
this very night you will be with her in Paradise!
 
The band sounds: Ta-ra-ra-ra-boom-de-ay!
With dissonant clash of cymbals, rattling boom of the snare
the curtain gapes, and the interminable show begins.
I am exposed and blinded in the ferocious floodlight glare
yet I am lambent and fearless, for I know all their secret sins.
 
I am the Queen of Artifice, Sorceress of Green Mirrors,
Seducer of Men: no life on earth is safe from my dreaming.
My mind and heart empty, I reflect back every desire
until the crowd is gutted on dreams and utterly spent.
At last, to the clamor of vociferous applause, I bow my head,
battered by the rain of sweaty silver coins.
 
Over the garish sound of the hurdy-gurdy
I cannot hear the song of the mermaid
and yearn for her forbidden kiss.

​

T. Bardou is originally from New York City, where she received a degree in classical languages and classical civilization. Bardou has made a living at varied careers, including as a fencing instructor, a personal trainer, a research assistant, and a Latin tutor. Bardou is currently on active duty military and, as a physician, has spent most of her career caring for active duty soldiers, and has recently gone back to a second residency for psychiatry so that she may better help them with their suffering.  She lives in MD and is a mother, a poet, a painter, as well as a resident in psychiatry.

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