Why God? by Zélia De Sousa

Why God?

My body is not strong anymore. Have to rest more often.
Arthritis is not always my friend. I cry when it paralyses my day. I can’t move. It hurts. 
I call my son to have a chat. ‘can’t right now, sport is on’
I call my daughter. ‘can’t right now, there’s a sale on’
I sit and wait for the phone to ring. It doesn’t.

I tried a new recipe today, not too bad if I say so myself. It’s sad eating alone.

Sitting in the cinema waiting for the film to start. If only I had someone to share my 
pop-corn with.

On a good day I go for a walk. ‘morning’ says a bystander. That’s the only close and personal word I will hear for the day. 

As I am drifting off to sleep I put in my request: ‘Hey God. I hear heaven is a nice place.  I’m ready.’

Woke up the next day. ‘Why God?’.  A leaflet is pushed through my door-letter-box.

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I help run The Cruise Ships’ Seafarers Ministry.  Filling the library shelves with different genre books for the crew to read onboard. Post their mail off to family & friends and sell phone cards. I smile listening to their chats.  We even have time to watch a movie and share pop-corn. And they love my home baked muffins.

‘See you soon’ I say in their language as they leave going back to being a sailor. Every hug is treasured.

I am never lonely. 
My arthritis doesn’t hurt as much.
I feel young again.
It’s a good day every day.

Now I know why God doesn’t want me in heaven.

‘Do you have a few minutes to spare?’ Advertises the leaflet. ‘Volunteers needed’.
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Zélia De Sousa is a Portuguese/South African now living in the United Kingdom. Brazilian Author Paulo Coelho inspired her to write after reading The Alchemist. She likes to write long/short stories, poetry and scripts. Zélia loves travelling and turning her adventures into stories. Her work has been published in Anthologies and Another Chicago Magazine. She is acknowledged in the memoir The True Adventures of Gidon Lev: A Holocaust Survivor.

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